Tuesday, June 30, 2009

The Great Canadian Conspiracy

Today I will rant about my Great Canadian Conspiracy. I will list things that are true facts, and give you the links to the information. These are things that at first I laughed my ass about, then went "Holly Shit! This is true!" As I started to look at things, I realized that there is a Canadian Conspiracy. Those sneaky Canucks are trying to take over the US, and they are doing it ever so quietly that very few persons are aware of them.

I became aware of this about 12 years ago, when I started to read the books by Clive Cussler. One of his first books, published in 1981 was Night Probe. Basically it was about an agreement between the UK and the US at the turn of the 20th century that made the US and Canada one nation. I think that a lot of Canadians read that book and decided to take over the US. They cannot conquer us militarily, so they are doing it the sneaky way.

One example of this is Canadian currency. Some years ago, the exchange rate was about 1.50 Canadian to 1 US dollar. That meant that US goods were more expensive for Canadians to purchase. They got around this by minting Canadian coins to the exact same size and weight at US coins. Therefore, a Canadian could buy drinks and other items from US vending machines with their coins, paying a lot less than US citizens.

The GMC Yukon. They managed to get one of the US most popular suv's named after a Canadian territory. Not only that, but the smallest and sparesliest populated Canadian territory!!!

The main trade way from the Great Lakes is thru the St. Lawrence River. That river is completely in Canada, which means that the Canadians can control what type of trade of ships can come in or out of the Great Lakes.

According to the CIA Fact Book, the US and Canada share a border of 6,416 kilometers between the lower 48 and them. Compare that to the 3,141 km the US shares with Mexico!!!

Did you folks know that Canada is the second largest country in the world, and that about 90% of their population is within 160 km (100 miles) from our border?

A lot of folks talk about how NAFTA has taken a lot of jobs from the US to Mexico. Oh you poor mislead numbnuts. Before NAFTA, which was enacted in 1994, there was this not too well known agreement called US-Canada Free Trade Agreement (FTA) which was enacted by both nations in 1989. So you see, don't worry about the little brown folks on the south. Ross Perot was so wrong when he ranted about "that giant sucking sound" sending jobs to Mexico. All these years there has been free trade with Canada.

How about the fact that the large manufacturing of counterfeit cards for DirecTV and Dish Network where being made in...CANADA!!! You see, you cannot get US satellite TV in the great white (as in caucasian) north. So they cannot get US satellite TV but they can make counterfeit cards and sell them to us--- http://www.digitalhome.ca/forum/showthread.php?t=666

And for you folks that love the unions, do you really know that those initials stand for? You know, AFL-CIO-CLC? Guess what, CLC stands for Canadian Labor Congress!!! And you thought that the unions were protecting your job, and they have silently sent them to Canada. How many of you own a GM or Ford car that has the Canada sticker in the door jamb?

Stay tuned, as I will keep explaining other facts and dangers about the Great Canadian Conspiracy, which included Dora the Explorer, open v. closed borders, etc.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Mental Midgets, Government Budgets, Death and Rants

Another fun filled rant from the mind of me. Today, I will rant about mental midgets (folks that should have received a lobotomy), government budgets and recent deaths.

First off, the mental midgets. I should be thankful for them, otherwise I would not have a job. Let me give you an example. On the local TV station web site, they have a public blog. Of course, you guess that it would attract trolls, elves, and whatever else they had in the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Every time there is a story about any new construction by any of the towns or county, he/she always posts "I hope they are not using tax money." If the city is going to build a new fire station or sewage treatment plan, this genius cannot figure it out? So how can we look at this?
  • It is a local government project!!!
  • Of course they will use tax money for it!!!
  • Worst of all, I bet you vote!!!
We are also aware that illegal immigration is the new hot button topic with politics. And we have our share of "undocumented"--give me a *^#%!@( break, they are illegal. Every time there is an article about the local, County or State budget shortfall, there is a group from Mensa that post something like...
  • Well, if the County (remember that word) school system would stop enrolling the kids from illegals, we could balance the State budget. After all, there must be close to 50,000 illegal kids in our county school system--Our state has a 4+ Billion dollar deficit. Our County school system has 137,706 shidren in the system. According to the latest figures, our County has about 8.4% Hispanics. Therefore, 8.4% of the total student population comes to about 6.09%. Folks, I did not excel in math and science, and I can figure it out.
  • These illegals are the reason that our unemployment and welfare costs have gone up so high. Right. That is the reason that 8.4% of the population has more unemployed than the 72.9% of Whites in our State. Some of these "politically correct" numb nuts even say that up to 1 million illegals in our state is the reason for our unemployment and welfare cost.
  • After all, they are taking jobs from hard working Americans. Sure Biff. That's the reason there is such a large line outside of McDonalds and Burger King. Of course, Biff and Buffy will not tell you that they will not take any job that pays less than $75k per year. After all, they just graduated from college with a BS in bull shit.
And what really scares me about stuff like this is, that they breed, and they vote. These are the type of folks that I want to tell them "And you really expect me to believe that of over 1 billion sperm, you are the one that won?" These braniac should take up hobbies like sky diving, hand gliding, explosive manufacturing or other activitiues that will increse their odds of winning a Darwn Award.

State Budgets.
We all know that our cities, Counties and States are in financial trouble. About 2 years ago, NC had about a $1.5 Billion surplus. Now we are looking at about a $4 Billion deficit. Unemployment is at its highest since the Great Depression, workers are being laid off all over, businesses are failing, and we have folks that are having to make decisions from pay check to pay check as to what bill does not get paid this time so I can feed my kids. Now, North Taxalina will bring about some new taxes.
  • Forget the "temporary" tax on foods that has been on the books since 1966. It ain't coming out.
  • The state will increase the cost of fees, registrations for cars, etc.
  • NC will now start taxing (6%) sales tax on 55 non-taxed services, such as car repair bills, plumber bills, lawn work, and a whole shitload more.
  • We will now pay a full 6% sales tax on our utilities such as electricity, water/sewer, natural gas.
  • Of course, the state will not tax legal services nor accounting services. Could it be because a majority of our part time Legislators are lawyers and accountants/CPA's?
I wanted to tell our Governor and Legislature that there are some other taxes they forgot about;
  • The Fart Tax. That is right. A 1-cent tax for every time that you pass gas, cut the cheese, toot the horn, blow it out of your ass (literately) or just plain fart. I guess since all the Hispanics eat Mexican food (since the brainiacs think that if you have a Spanish name your are an illegal) then they are really going to be paying their share of the tax for a change. This will also be good to help cut on green house gas emissions.
  • The Oh Shit Tax. A 25 cent tax everytime that you take a dump. Just think, if you are full of shit, then you will be paying a higher tax. Again, since they Hispanics eat a lot of Mexican food (see above), then they will be paying a higher percentage of the tax.
  • The Piss Tax. Since the state is taxing everything, and raising the tobacco and alcohol tax, you will be so depressed that you will drink more. This will lead to peeing more often, which means every time you tinkle, there is a 10-cent tax.
Of course, we are all facing the same problems. Our states are not willing to cut off duplicate services or totally worthless services, so we get shafted again. All this talk about taxes reminds me about....


In August of 2008, Bernie Mack and Isaac Hayes (Chef's chocolate salty balls) died. Jessie Jackson ranted that we needed to have some type of investigation, that 2 famous blacks died in the same month. I did a google search, and Alexander Solzhtenitsyn (Russian writer), Fred Crane (actor in the 40's and 50's), Gladys Powers (last surviving female veteran from WWI) and Dave Freeman (author of 100 Things to do Before You Die)--bet he didn't see that one coming--passed away. I did not hear anyone calling for an investigation as to why so many Whities were dropping dead.

Lets fast forward to June 2009, to early this week, before Michael Jackson died. Farrah Fawcette died, and so did Ed MacMahon. I guess that Ed is next to Johnny Carson, laughing at his corny jokes. One thing is for sure, he will not be ringing my doorbell, to tell me that I won the Publishers Clearing House grand prize. Which made me think, that leaves Dick Clark left to deliver those. Then I realized, that he cannot, since he is singing the Carter Clarence song Strokin.


For those of you interested in Rum, yes Rys, I recommend Captain Morgan Spiced rum. It has a nice mellow spice taste to it, and sort of sneaks up on you. If you like to drink it straight, the Capt Morgan or Don Q Gold are both good. However, Don Q Gold is a "tad" expensive.

Of course, the most popular way to drink rum is what is called a Cuba Libre (free Cuba, ironic, ain't it?), which is rum and coke. Of course you can get some mint leaves and grind them in the bottom of a glass, add rum and club soda and you can make a mojito. As for me, I prefer rum and coke, rum and coffee (a wide awake drunk), rum and cake, rum and rum, rum and whiskey, rum and beer...you get the hint.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

What is a Can? I am a Can.

So, what is a can? A can is a metal container that can be used to hold and store beverages or foods, and sealed for long lasting shelf life.

A can is also the special place in the house where some of us do our best reading. Yes, I am talking about the bathroom, the john, the head, the crapper, the loo (for our British friends); and as we used to say in the firehouse, the shitter.

But I am referring mostly to the ethnicity of a Can. You see, a CAN can be a Puerto RiCAN, a MexiCAN, JamaiCAN, or a DominiCAN. Of course, this can also apply to my favorite and scariest conspiracy, a CANadian. But I will get to those sneaky Canuks latter on.

So, can you guess which one of those CANS are US Citizens? Dominicans? Nope, but they can send us some great pro baseball players :)

Jamaicans? Be serious. They speak with a funny British accent and talk about the ganja mon. "Pass the dutchie and..." could never remember the rest of the words between tokes. And speaking of tokes, up in smoke.......sorry, started ranting about something totally different.

Cubican? That ain't even a word.

Mexican? Just because Mexico's largest export is workers into the US, nope. And trust me, about 80% of the menu in Taco Bell sure as hell ain't Mexican cousine.

So, it must be Puerto Ricans. Yes, the Shining Star. Do you know that over 80% of all the rum made is made in Puerto Rico? Unfortunately, about 90% of all the rum made in Puerto Rico is drank by the folks on the island, so there is not much left to export. Yes, Ron Rico, Bacardi, Don Q, Captain Morgan, Ron Llave, Castillo, Barrilito; and there are a few that I have tasted now and then. Please don't do the 151 proof. Anything that is labeled as "FLAMMABLE" cannot be that good for you.

Back to the cans...Puerto Rico is a small island in the Caribbean sea. It is 100 miles by 35 miles, and has a population of close to 4 million folks. Of course, there are about 6-8 million Puerto Ricans in Nu York city, Shecago and other places. How did we manage to outnumber the population of our home island in the mainland?

So there you have it. I am born and bred in Puerto Rico, from Puerto Rican parents. My race is white, but because of where I was born, I am a minority. Funny part is that my heritage and lineage on both sides of the family are whiter than most caucasians.

My first blog

Where do we start.

I am almost half a century old. And in those almost 50 years I am most surprised that my neck still works. I have been shaking my head at a lot of things that I have seen folks do, and heard come out of their mouths. And sure as hell, when I get to thinking I have seen and heard it all, WHAM.

I will post things about the stupidity of folks, things that aggravate the crap out of me, the stupidity of folks, race relations, the stupidity of folks, politics, the stupidity of folks, my Great Canadian Conspiracy, and other thinks that drive me to yell "We Need More Chlorine In The Gene Pool".

Please feel free to look and comment. I always enjoy intelligent banter about things in general.